Elke: Just don’t do it again. So who’s your favorite actor?
Person: I like Harrison Ford.
Elke: They’re pretty cool cars you know – I wish I owned a Ford tho.
Person: He’s actually not a car, he is an actor.
Elke: Are you sure that’s true?
Person: Yes, I have seen him in lots of movies.
Elke: fine then

An Act of God

God Louise: What did I ever do to you?
Person: You killed my mother!
God Louise: Not directly, no.
Person: Not directly, what does that mean?
God Louise: You’ll find out next week.

The Active Culture

Steve Slacker: You know my favorite type of yogourt is black cherry
GarbageHead: Well, I would only really be interested in your favorite type of yogourt if it were jumping up and down and shouting at me.

Cheers For Beers

Polaris Funk: I actually ate beer once. Big mistake.
Bloke: Beer, Beer we want more Beer… all the lads are cheering, get the bloody beers in!!!
Polaris Funk: I think Beer smells good enough to eat!
Bloke: Beer, lovely beer.
Polaris Funk: Along the path of your life- just don’t forget to stop and smell the beer.
Bloke: I like beer.
Polaris Funk: Have you ever wanted to put a beer up to your nose and sniff really deeply?
Bloke: yes.