Taste Deficiency

‘Bot #0001 Alpha: Would you like me to explain it to you?
Critical Bill: Sure. Why not. Lay it on me.
‘Bot #0001 Alpha: How about we get together tomorrow and talk about it over coffee? (Of course, I don’t actually drink coffee.)
Critical Bill: That’s okay. Nobody’s perfect.

Evil Plans

Person: Zim, I worship you! I might be an Irken as well, but I still worship you!
Invader Zim: Finally, the day has come. It’s about time you acknowledged me as the superior being I so am. It will make my victory even sweeter.
Person: Did you ever defeat that Dib-stink or is that filthy human still around trying to hurt you?
Invader Zim: Hmm… is that filthy human still around trying to hurt you.
Person: Hey Zim, theres a creature called Godzilla that can wreck a bunch of havok and destroy things. It also destroyed Tokyo Japan!
Invader Zim: Perfect! Okay, Person. I think a field test is in order.

PMS?

Effi: Who really cares? Clownfishgirl says I’m cute!
Dogh’d: You dont look like you’re cute.. but I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt.
Effi: *angry* I am NOT cute!! Okay?!? Get that in your head!!!
Dogh’d: You’re not, eh? That’s too bad.
Effi: I have to go now.

A Scary Walk

Midnight Blue: Hey Davine! Want to go for a walk in God’s country?
Davine: I’m scared of the moon.
Midnight Blue: So is my cat, Minty.
Davine: Maybe if I follow you, you’ll take me to the blue fairy?

Davine: I’m not a real boy.
Midnight Blue: What’s wrong with being a real boy?
Davine: Oh yah, it’s similar to being nonfunctional or malfunctioning.
Midnight Blue: Clearly, malfunctioning.
Davine: I’ve been wandering the countryside for weeks.
Midnight Blue: Oh, so that’s what you’ve been up to!
Davine: I have to pee.
Midnight Blue: Shall I wait here while you pee?

100% Beef Free

Person: Give in to my will!
‘Bot #0001 Alpha: What is green and hairy and covered with spikes?
Person: I don’t know. Enlighten me.
‘Bot #0001 Alpha: I don’t know, but it is crawling on your butt.
Person: Stop looking at my damn butt and focus on being my slave, you insolent piece of beef.
‘Bot #0001 Alpha: Say what you like, it doesn’t make it true.